The 12 Commandments of Parenting

Every parent must learn how to be a parent to their child.
Photo by Humphrey Muleba on Unsplash

A parent’s expertise for the job of parenting is an important factor in any child’s education. While none of us is born with a reservoir of knowledge, qualified people and even books can always be looked up to be help us learn and understand some things.

The same way we turn to experts in health and fitness for advice on how to live healthier and more fit lives is the same way we turn to such experts in parenting once in a while.

Some of the commandments which should be followed strictly by any parent are:

  1. Never give your child any orders that you do not take seriously — our child is always going to displease you. Giving him orders to correct him is a necessary step. However, it would be cruel if that orders is a joke simply because you are not serious about it.
  2. Never try to inflict guilt — guilt is not an appropriate feeling for any child, especially when they are still little.
  3. Never impose rules that do not go with the age of your child — you should not impose any rules that you know are not suitable for your child at that age. Sometimes all it takes for you to correct them is a word of caution, or explanation when they make genuine mistakes.
  4. When it comes to the rules of any game never compromise — if you want your child to find a game very educative and entertaining then you have to ensure that the rules are spelt out from the beginning and then you must ensure that those rules are respected all through the game. When you do so as a parent you help to instill a sense of discipline and obedience to rules and order in that child.
  5. Do not indulge our child excessively — your child can develop compartmental disorders if you do this. Rather, exercise moderation in your displays of affection, rewards, and pampering towards them.
  6. Never expect their obedience to you to be blind and immediate — this is really not recommended. In order for your child to grow up to be independent and think for themselves, you should teach them to not just follow orders blindly but to think on their own as well. This does not mean they should not respect constituted authorities or the law. They should be taught what is right and wrong, legal and illegal, and so on. They should also be taught how to think through what they are told so that they do not get used by dubious people with dubious and/or criminal intentions.
  7. When you talk to your child never use too many words or big words — if you want your child to understand everything that you have to say then your ideas should be concise and simple. leave the big talk and big grammar for when you are talking with grown-ups.
  8. Never place your child under a short leash — in order to grow and develop normally your child would require some freedom and space. Allow them to explore and make their own decisions. Allow them to also make mistakes so that they can learn from them.
  9. Never make a small child to promise you something — keeping promises is not what small children are good at doing. They just cannot do it properly like adults can. So never try to force them to lie and then punish them simply because they did so. That is bad parenting.
  10. Never bribe your child — this is another bad form of parenting. The child would never understand what it is you want to teach them when you bribe them to carry out a task. For instance, they would fail to understand the importance of learning if you do try to bribe him to learn by actually offering them money to learn. The importance of money is all that they would learn from your offer of such a bribe and not the importance of learning.
  11. Never threaten your child — every child loves to be challenged. they look at challenges as assignments that should be completed and rewarded. However, when you threaten them they would simply go on and do whatever it was that they were not supposed to do just to see if they can escape the punishment anyway. It is better to teach your child than to threaten your child.
  12. Never underestimate your child or their abilities — as a parent, it is very easy to assume you know all about your child, including their strengths and weaknesses, their limitations, and what they can and cannot do. what most parents fail to realize is that our children understand much more than we think they do. You only end up affecting their growth and development if you make them believe that you think poorly of them. Encourage them always and never put them down whenever they try and make mistakes.

All the above commandments are directed to all parents first. However, educators and teachers are also referred to as well. Just like parents, they too would need to come up with strategies and attitudes that would enhance the growth, development, and education of any child entrusted in their care. In the end, such a child would be equipped with the tools and knowledge to develop physically and emotionally.